Breaking News: CAGE-NAPPING
Breaking News: Hello Movie Mates, We interrupt your regularly scheduled Blog to bring you Breaking News out of Oaks, Pa at the Local Oaks Center Cinema. On February 18 th at approximately 8:50pm, Bartender/Bouncer/Concessionist/Ticket Taker, Cardboard Nic Cage was CAGE-NAPPED! Details are still emerging on this atrocity, but what we do know is that Cardboard Nic Cage is described as “Nicolas Cage, but Cardboard”. Unofficial’s are seeking any knowledge the public may have on this Cage-napping, if you have any information please contact info@oakscentercinema.com.
Local correspondent John E. Movie was on location today interviewing the General Manager of the Oaks Center Cinema.
J.E.M: Firstly, I am sorry to hear about Cardboard Nic Cage.
GM: Thank you John, we are all very saddened by this turn of events
J.E.M: Can you tell me a little bit about Cardboard Nic Cage?
GM: Well John, he was only with us a short time but we all came to know and love Cardboard Nic Cage. He wasn’t just a Bartender/Bouncer/Concessionist/Ticket Taker….He was our friend.
J.E.M: That’s Depressing.
GM: Yeah
J.E.M: Are there any suspects at this time?
GM: Yes, there are several suspects at this time, but the main suspect is the kid we caught on camera physically stealing him. Other suspects include John Travolta.
J.E.M: So you said earlier that Cardboard Nic Cage was Bartending, is that right?
GM: Why Yes John, we opened up our Bar to the public Friday afternoon. We are currently selling Beer and Wine, with Cocktails and Mixed drinks coming real soon.
J.E.M.: That’s amazing.
GM: Speaking of Amazing, on March 9 th we are hosting a Family Friendly Magic show.
J.E.M.: No Way!
GM: Yes Way!
J.E.M: Where can I purchase Tickets?
GM: at theComedyexplosion.com
J.E.M: Fantastic, well that’s all the time we have today. Is there anything else you would like to use this tragedy to shamelessly plug?
GM: Nope, but I will say to the person who took Nic Cage…..That was very uncool and You are not a true Movie Mate.